tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-60089472024-03-23T14:23:14.297-04:00Chauncey BillupsFall Back Shaq...I'm Starting NowBillupshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15880114171279251935noreply@blogger.comBlogger87125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6008947.post-1150893520193553202006-06-21T08:17:00.000-04:002006-11-07T12:49:15.740-05:00THEN THEY CALL THE SHIT THE BOMB SMACKAdam Morrison's got the Panic! at the Rectory suit rocking.Jesuits have more fun. It was definitely a step up from this:Nice pleats, God. Looks like he pulled a B&E on the fucking Gap...in 1988. Actually...looks like a two-man job:The fact that these two play online Halo 2 together is one of the fucking factoids of the century. Who gets to be Master Chief?! Billupshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15880114171279251935noreply@blogger.com10tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6008947.post-1130521931178014802005-10-28T13:43:00.000-04:002005-10-28T13:56:17.293-04:00HIGH LIKE GIRAFFE ASSThe Pistons just want everyone to know that the road to San Antonio goes through Detroit. Get a trip-tik, duke. Now you may ask, Oh seer of seers, how will the Motown Get Along Gang continue to push their reign on the top beyond leprechaun proportions? Easy. Teamwork. When Carlos Arroyo got into a little bit of turkey-burger level beef with D-Notz last night, he got himself Billupshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15880114171279251935noreply@blogger.com13tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6008947.post-1130361224410279822005-10-26T16:38:00.000-04:002005-10-26T17:24:38.466-04:00I CARRY STRIPES IN HOOD. I AM ZEBRA.Shit, we're possesed like a gun charge over here. Denver is looking mighty healthy this year. Got a few qualms with Kiki signing Earl Watson this off seas. You know who else has beef with that signing? Earl fucking Watson, that's who! Dude kept Memphis afloat last season while JWill was playing like a meth addict robbing a fucking Sonic (don't know what that Billupshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15880114171279251935noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6008947.post-1130353722682731062005-10-26T15:07:00.000-04:002005-10-26T15:17:59.260-04:00TICKLE ME PINK LIKE...Keep your x-ray in top shape. Don't wanna catch nothing on the Usher tour or whatever. Inside, El Ron talks about wanting to box Ben Wallace for 10 mil on pay-per. He also says he and Larry Bird were brought together by the biggest VP of basketball operations there is...YAHWEH. His name doth ring out, no? Billupshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15880114171279251935noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6008947.post-1113001391728448222005-10-25T14:20:00.000-04:002005-10-26T11:10:13.973-04:00BACK IN THE GARAGE WITH MY BULLSHIT DETECTOREddy Curry's heart beat sounds like Sasquatch feet! Blind, crippled or crazy, Isaiah Thomas will give you major figures. He swiped Baby Shaq from the bum-ticker pile, trading the lockeroom equivalent of Avian Bird Flu (I see you, Tim T.!) and some spare parts for the promising center. Larry's boys are shaping up to be the best shit on hardwood since Billupshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15880114171279251935noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6008947.post-1108421660432819292005-02-14T17:24:00.000-05:002005-02-16T14:22:42.703-05:00PLEASE BRING MY CAKE BACKTip your Bowler hat to the original Lil' Flip. The Wolves were built for a short window, and that window has apparently slammed shut on their necks.I'm saying this year's Wolves squad--with the return of Wally and the lost Neville brother, Troy Hudson, and the emergence of Eddie Griffin--was like some Ikea furniture or something. You got these pieces, the shit makes senseBillupshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15880114171279251935noreply@blogger.com14tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6008947.post-1107895475266472912005-02-08T15:24:00.000-05:002005-02-14T17:14:30.573-05:00STEP INSIDE THE BOOTH, SUPERMAN IS ALIVE-Miami beat the Spurs last night. Just to show you who wears the cape on the Heat side, Wade had a 28-5-6. One-kidney-'Zo is on the way, Eddie Jones' finger is in a splint, and pretty soon they're probably gonna be able to swipe Rafer, Donyell Marshall and Jalen from the Raptors for Season One of Miami Vice. Maybe some of those Western Conference crews are Billupshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15880114171279251935noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6008947.post-1106877280729890212005-01-27T20:05:00.000-05:002005-01-27T20:54:40.730-05:00DON'T HAVE ME ZIP DOWN THIS JACKET, OPEN THE OVEN UP
This is your OFFICIAL CHAUNCEY BILLUPS GUIDE TO THE FUTURE CAREER OF GEORGE KARL-HEAD COACH OF THE DENVER NUGGETSakaI REMEMBER MILWAUKEE!!!Phase 1 (The remainder of the season): As Marc Stein calls him, Furious George is in the building talking some shit about how Denver is a dream job (Alex English retired, God!). The players start sensing Billupshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15880114171279251935noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6008947.post-1104873459224529472005-01-04T16:07:00.000-05:002005-01-25T18:35:08.433-05:00I AM THE MOTHERFUCKING SHORE PATROL, MOTHERFUCKER!
New Orleans: The Movie...starring Marlee Matlin as Jim Jackson because BRAH CAN'T HEAR THE NOLIA CLAP. Traded by Houston to Nawlins for David Wesley, Double J elected to flip the bird to the trifling Hornets by not reporting for duty. GM Alan Bristow, in trying to sell his bottom-feeding club to Jackson, via the media, had this to say:
“One Billupshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15880114171279251935noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6008947.post-1104256012688070862004-12-28T11:54:00.000-05:002004-12-29T17:32:55.180-05:00EVEN ROY JONES...
Random notes from the Indy/Detroit on Christmas Day (while eating potato salad, napping, and polishing off a Yuengling six pack)
-First off, what the fuck is up with the slow-mo, black and white montage of the Pacers/Pistons brawl, accompanied by Coldplay's, "Clocks." Because who among us, when presented with images of Jermaine O'Neal caving in someone's head, is not Billupshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15880114171279251935noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6008947.post-1103581377908221352004-12-20T16:57:00.000-05:002004-12-20T17:22:57.906-05:00HOW THE EAST WAS...
Made somewhat more intersting? Half-man/Half-Butterscotch Krimpet is coming to the Swamp. Some in Jerz might be pretty excited to see Vince Carter run the break with the Kidd and the kid, Richard Jefferson (though isn't R.J. a younger, more durable version of Vinsanity, Rod Thorn?).
Lord knows when Carter will throw on the Meadowlands Blue, as his achilles heel continues toBillupshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15880114171279251935noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6008947.post-1103223871793804252004-12-16T13:08:00.000-05:002004-12-16T14:06:08.856-05:00YOU'LL BE WEARING A BLACK SUIT A LONG TIME
A Univesity of Florida education. It is the stuff that bench warmers and real estate agents are made of. One thing they apparently don't teach on the manicured lawns or under the flourescent lights of UF is self-preservation, because last night Raptors forward and UF alum Matt Bonner--the dude his teammates affectionately call, "Opie,"--stared death Billupshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15880114171279251935noreply@blogger.com14tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6008947.post-1103141279992780892004-12-15T13:38:00.000-05:002004-12-15T15:10:18.150-05:00THIS IS THE REALEST SINCE KUMBAYA
Yesterday started like any other for Sixers backup combo guard Willie Green. Upon entering the warm hearth of camaraderie that is the Sixers locker room, he was welcomed by his mentor, Allen Iverson, who shouted over the din of reporters:
"That's an ugly shirt, Willie"
He was referring to the burgundy and yellow blouse that Green was rocking. Much a guffaw Billupshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15880114171279251935noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6008947.post-1103048876815895932004-12-14T13:06:00.000-05:002004-12-14T13:27:56.816-05:00AND SHE KEEP ASKING, "HOW IT SHOOT IF IT'S PLASTIC?"
Word to Cedric Ceballos, the Phoenix Suns are really bringing back the old-school (to me, because I'm Kicking and Screaming like that) style of play that made me love basketball in the first place. I'm talking about the Running Rebel Anderson Hunt! The fuck you know about Mookie Blaylock and the Sooners, dude?! Fuck a NCAA violation!
The Billupshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15880114171279251935noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6008947.post-1102708327643372502004-12-10T13:34:00.000-05:002004-12-10T15:25:51.326-05:00RELAPSE, I STAY ZAPPED, MY URINE AIN'T CLEAN
Read the headlines, suckers. Today's the deadline. He who fell from the tree of Marbury is not BALCO-ing it. Just saying that Young Telfair dropped 11 points in 25 minutes for his first significant contribution of the year, as the Blazers beat the Celtics in some last-second shit.
"Once you get that first point you get your momentum. I call it Billupshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15880114171279251935noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6008947.post-1102541333381930802004-12-08T15:33:00.000-05:002004-12-09T15:00:29.303-05:00YOU JUST REALLY NEED A HUG, STUPID
Truly, no division is as beshitted as the Atlantic. I, as a Philadelphian, shiver at the thought that a revitalized Jerz (what with Jason back) team might make a run in a div. where 8-9 gets you first place.
(Which reminds of a dream I had the other night where I was hanging out in a supermarket and some dude got on the Pathmark P.A. and said, "I have a Billupshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15880114171279251935noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6008947.post-1102437545337360222004-12-07T11:27:00.000-05:002004-12-08T16:29:37.770-05:00BLOW THIS LIKE A TRUMPET
With a new lineup full of hot shit free agents (Carlos Boozer and Mehmet Okur) and a point guard coming off a star-making Olympics performance (Carlos Arroyo), the Utah Jazz looked primed to make a run deep into the very trill Western Conference playoffs. And after notching a 6-1 record to start the season, that seemed exactly where they were going. But they play 82 Billupshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15880114171279251935noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6008947.post-1092951157636254682004-12-01T17:18:00.000-05:002004-12-01T12:49:00.810-05:00STRETCH CHINA LIKE...
Things are not going so well in Screwston. After aquiring Tracy McGrady over the off-season, the Rockets looked poised to rise like cream to the top of the West. But the Boss Hog Outlawz are playing like half and half.
Maybe it has to do with the fact that 1993 Heisman winner, Charlie "You Need To Get Jesus In Your Life" Ward is their starting PG. Could be that T-Mac is Billupshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15880114171279251935noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6008947.post-1100018941238583262004-11-09T11:48:00.000-05:002004-11-23T13:52:40.266-05:00TRAMPS LIKE US
So Ron gets his time off , Ben Wallace gets a slap on the wrist, Bill Walton pitches a fit ("The shock, dismay and sadness have not diminished at all with time" CHILL OUT JEFFERSON AIRPLANE, IT'S NOT LIKE A KENNEDY GOT SHOT), that fat kid who looked like Turtle from Entourage gets his dome dented by Jermaine (don't worry, when he's done raiding J.O.'s financial holdings he be Billupshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15880114171279251935noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6008947.post-1099597669519232512004-11-04T13:32:00.000-05:002004-11-04T14:53:10.376-05:00I GAVE YOU POWER
Gilbert Arenas is a man capable of dropping 20 points and 10 assists on any given night. He is also a man capable of going cuckoo for coco puffs at the drop of a dime. Gil missed the season opener with his Wizards due to an NBA suspension, for "a gun registration mishap." Gil had this to say:
""It was an oversight on my part,"
Gil continued..."My kids went out and took careBillupshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15880114171279251935noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6008947.post-1099586312959233202004-11-04T11:30:00.000-05:002004-11-04T15:48:22.026-05:00BRING EM OUT, BRING EM OUT
The NBA jump-off has jump offed under the shadow of the Presidential election. You might think that most ballers of the L don't care who sits in the White House, as long as their ACL holds and their check clears. WRONG. Just ask Scot Pollard, back-back-back up forward/center of Larry Legend's Pacers. (BTW, Scot voted Bush)
"Hey, I'm just glad it's over. I didn't Billupshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15880114171279251935noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6008947.post-1098396576883732892004-10-21T13:13:00.000-04:002004-10-25T18:48:46.320-04:00GIRLS, GIRLS...YOU'RE BOTH PRETTY
The pre-season is a time for starters to lean back, for role players to demand contract extensions, for coaches to sow the seeds of future ulcers and for undrafted young dudes to consider the pro's and con's of playing in lovely Macedonia. But every once in a while the pressure cooker gets pressureized, despite being several weeks away from true-balling timeBillupshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15880114171279251935noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6008947.post-1097614093167092412004-10-12T15:33:00.000-04:002004-10-13T16:43:41.586-04:00WOOF
Qyntel Woods! After two seasons of toiling on the end of the Blazers bench and getting arrested outside of Portland strip clubs, young Q. has been suspended, indefinitely.
Seems Woods is being investigated for dog abandonment and hosting dog fights in his Portland home. This comes on the heels of Q's summer-long effort to clean up his act (aka losing the corn-rows, getting treatment for Billupshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15880114171279251935noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6008947.post-1097091809765789492004-10-06T15:40:00.000-04:002004-10-06T15:43:29.766-04:00ONE OF THESE....
Three headlines from Boston sports sections failed to inspire sparks of hope and energy in whiskey-dicked Beantown men rising for another day of life:
RED SOX DOWN ANGELS 9-3
ORTIZ: "I SAY 'FUCK YOU, JOBU! I DO IT MYSELF!'"
PATRIOTS UNDEFEATED FOR MORE THEN A YEAR
BELICHEK: "I'MA PISS ON LOMBARDI'S GRAVE!"
GARY PAYTON REPORTS TO CELTICS CAMP
Billupshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15880114171279251935noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6008947.post-1092758888619657172004-08-17T12:06:00.000-04:002004-08-17T12:43:20.666-04:00IF YOU WHACK ME, YOU CAN'T BE THE BOSS
After dispatching one of the winningest coaches of all-time, and probably forcing the trade of the most dominant player in the game, defacto GM, and amateur poet, Kobe Bryant made a few more moves.
According to the Boston Herald, Kobe Bryant was instrumental in getting journeyman forward Chris Mihm included in the now be-shitted Lakers-Celtics trade Billupshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15880114171279251935noreply@blogger.com1